drownedindreams: ([s6] overwhelmed)
Tara Knowles ([personal profile] drownedindreams) wrote 2014-05-08 03:52 am (UTC)

"I've done so much that's wrong," Tara says as her voice cracks, and she's holding Katie's hand tightly. "But I thought that this- if I could keep it together, if I just- if I could keep it so no one would know, that it would be okay now. That this would be a new start, not- This happened before." She's trying not to let this spiral out of control, but it's that he'd been stabbed before. He'd been stabbed before, twice in the chest, in the same spot but on the other side.

He didn't have the club. She couldn't protect him.

Tara's head lifted when Katie asked the first question - because the answer to that is unequivocally yes, because Jax has always done things he shouldn't, but the second.... her eyes widen because while there's a whirlwind of thoughts that come with that sentence - Ida. Belfast. We're not your family. The brothel. The secrets. The violence. - she knows that's not what Katie means, and even if she did.... she's said worse to him. God knew she'd hurt him worse, even though in the end.... she knew how it would have ended.

She'd asked him - this him, she'd asked him to make it look like an accident so their boys wouldn't know, which had horrified him to the point that she wondered how much it'd hurt him.

"No. No, he's- He's a good man. He tries hard - we've been together since high school, he's never laid a hand on me, or... or emotional... or anything. He's... he's a good man. I came back- I'm from three years, and things- they broke him." It was the first time she's said it like that. "They ruined us," she said, her voice dropping to a whisper. "Things ruined us. I thought this was a chance-" Her voice caught, and she shook her head yet again.

"He's still good. I... I'm not, and I can't- I can't- he'll hate me, you know that? He'll hate me, and I can't- I was running with my boys, I took them and I was running away and I ended up here, and I know so much and it would kill him--" That's when she looked away, trying to gain some semblance of composure, because this... this wasn't helping, this wasn't her being able to carry on.

Post a comment in response:

This account has disabled anonymous posting.
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.
More info about formatting